


A Day in the Life of a Zombie

by Elius_ShadowBane



Category: Original Work
Genre: Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-11
Updated: 2018-07-11
Packaged: 2019-06-08 21:07:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15252048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elius_ShadowBane/pseuds/Elius_ShadowBane
Summary: a silly short story about a zombie and coffee.





	A Day in the Life of a Zombie

Brian sat in his coffin. He was bored. It’s tough when you come back to life while buried underground. Well, not really life. Sort of unlife. He was a zombie, he figured. He didn’t remember what he was like when he was alive, but he figured he must have been, since he was dead now.  
Anyways, he was bored. It wasn’t like the worms made good company. They kept trying to eat him. It was annoying. He was also pretty hungry. Some chocolate would be nice. Maybe a cup of coffee. He dug away at the dirt above him, and slowly clawed his way up. His hand finally broke the surface, plunging upwards into the moonlight. He pushed his head above the soil level, and was greeted by a couple staring at him. How rude. He couldn’t be THAT ugly, right? “Herro, mey nam ish Brian.” The couple screamed and fled. Maybe he had surprised them? Ooh, but one dropped their wallet. Now he could afford coffee.  
As he shambled down the street, people fled in every direction. When he tried to introduce himself to them, they just screamed more. Grumbling over his shoulder, he walked into the cafe. The cashier gave him only a glance before returning to his book. “What will you have, sir?”  
“Coufghee.” He growled, “Wisht cream.” after a glance at the display, he continued, “angd a mugffin.”  
“That will be 4.95, sir.” The cashier didn’t take his eyes off his book as he fetched the food with one hand.  
“Waght yuu redigb?” Brian queried as he placed the money on the counter, “Ig guite enjoug bucks, murself.”  
“World war Z,” The cashier muttered.  
“Gud buck.” Brian nodded approvingly, and walked out of the store.


End file.
